I wish I were that strong

I have had the opportunity recently to witness and read about amazingly strong people lately. By strong, I mean people who take impossibly difficult emotional and physical situations and not only survive but do it with a willing heart.

The first is my aunt. She is a single mother to two adult girls with a very rare genetic disorder. The disease causes blindness, seizures, loss of gross and fine motor skills, dementia, and early death. I was able to spend a couple days with them this past week (they live out of state) and was humbled by my aunt's passion to give them a normal life and not give up. Both girls are in wheelchairs and must be assisted or lifted in and out to go to the bathroom or get into bed. This requires great physical strength, because these girls are adult women now (26 and 24). They take so much medication that any other person would die of an overdose. My aunt is a retired nurse, and she makes a point to know everything she can and question the doctors and nurses constantly. The doctors are at the point of saying "you tell us what to do, because you know best."

Anyway, the point of this story is how my aunt gets up everyday and handles this. I only spent 3 days with them, and I already was thinking of returning to my normal routines and not hearing the uncontrolable jabbering they can't help. She deals with this everyday by herself. She now has some nursing assistance in their house, but according to the state, the girls qualify for places in a nursing home. She refuses to give up on them and forces them to keep pushing everyday. She won't let them give up without fighting to the end of this, and I'm humbled by that. I don't know if I could find that strength within myself, and it makes me sad. It also strengths my belief that our paths were charted before we got to this life, and that what we encounter is not more than what we can handle. If we have to deal with such hardships, we've been programmed to do so.

The other example is a lost friend from high school. I became her friend on Facebook recently and found a link to her blog. I read all the past posting (like I always do with new blogs). Her son was born a little over a year ago with a brain malformation. Even though it has to be the most heartbreaking thing to know your child will be born with a problem, I'm continually amazed at people who aren't just wiped out on the floor weeping. I'm sure they are at some point, but this women and her husband seem so amazingly strong. They continually rely on their faith in God to guide them and provide healing for their son. They always are positive that changes in surgery schedules or his prognosis have a reason that will eventually be revealed. They never once wallow in self pity but instead hail their son's achievements and remind everyone else to have a blessed day. I wouldn't link to her blog so as to not invade her privacy, but I want others to be touched by their family's amazing strength.

I'd like to think if I had to face such a situation I'd be as strong, but I'm not convinced. I'm going to be selfish and hope I never have to test that though. I guess my husband's late-diasnosed heart condition and resulting surgery could compare, but it's not the same as a child's pain and suffering (ps...my husband's surgery was successful and he's good as new). We've been blessed with a beautiful, healthy daughter who is so amazing. I think about how I'd feel if she wasn't who she was, and I'm not convinced I'd not see the same soul in her eyes.

My belief is that our souls, in conjunction with God, plot our paths before we get here. We determine what we want to learn this time around on Earth, how we want to learn it, and who is going to help us. We have choices once we get here, but some things just are going to happen so that we can keep towards that goal. (Have you ever met someone and immediately felt as though you've waiting for this person to come into your life? I can think of a few people, even those whom I've lost contact with, that I feel like I need to be friends with for some reason.) They have to be advanced souls that have taken on the burden of caring for others. I only hope I can learn a side lesson from observing them and carry it into the next life.